The Moment of Reunion

Oh My God.
I'm so so so sorry. I feel so sinful for leaving you guys for MONTHS and this is highly unacceptable.

So this post is about hello and a few goodbyes. But why the title's reunion? Because this is the post that reunites me and you lovely readers!

So basically my life is pretty good [not that you guys bother asking but whatever] and I've been so busy these two months; you know, preparing for final exams which will determine whether I proceed to eleventh grade or not and also for the graduation ceremony of the seniors (22nd batch).

Since I join the platoon PATAKA I'm going to wear this suit called 'PDU' or 'Pakaian Dinas Upacara' which can only be worn for certain occasions by certain people, which made me felt kinda special.

I've been trying to lose weights and I know it's very shameful to tell you this but I guess I need to tell you guys about my life in TN.

Psst; gonna post the pictures in my next post!

And the final exams were pretty fine. There weren't so many remedial I needed to take and we were so busy finding gifts and souvenirs for our beloved sisters and brothers who were about to end their educational story in TN soon. I was so panicked that I needed to ask my mom for some help by sending me stuff from Jakarta. I'm such an ungrateful daughter. Pardon me, Mom, I still love you hehe.

And guess what? I just had my sweet 16th! Yay! *rolling on the floor*

I'm so grateful for everything and everyone that I have around me. I'm so thankful for my supportive family who has been here all along, the existence of my best friends that strengthen my will to stay in the campus and eventually survive haha, and for someone who's been around for a while *cough*

The story is pretty funny and sweet. How we're so old-fashioned by sending each other letters and all and everyone who knows this always asks me, "What year do you live in? The 70s? You still send letters and notes? Funny." And all I can do is laugh. They don't know how worthy all those moments in writing and receiving the letters.

Guess that's what makes us special?

How we're so different in backgrounds and personalities but share common interests and how I feel like this person completes me; I enjoy every single difference and similarity.

I don't want to conclude everything real fast, I can't figure whether we'll still be together or it will be over before it even starts. But at least for now, I love having him around, although it means not to talk to each other or make contacts at all. As long as those eyes still stare at me the way they always do, I know I still keep him in this *pointing at my chest* but no I didn't mean the chest, but what's inside [read: heart] haha.

Okay, enough about this person.

I still have more stories to share about in TN. So we've been preparing, right, and I finally get my badge for my platoon! Yay! And I also took pictures with my beloved seniors. It felt so so so so sad to see them leave, especially when my beloved brother couldn't make it.

So guess I haven't told you guys about my senior. He was the same absent as I am when he was a 10th grader; X-7/28. His name is Rafi Fauzan Santoso. I call him Bang Rafi. He couldn't be in the ceremony because he was having tests to become a cadet. Knowing that he couldn't make it, although I had been told about it, I cried like a lot and everyone was staring at me strangely seeing me crying like a big baby. He's been so special for me because he supported me all along, he cheered me up, he listened to my random stories about my life and my crush, and he cared for me like his own sister.

In May, he gave me a piece of cake and he also gave me a post-it which said 'I'm sorry I couldn't make it to the ceremony because of the tests and I really do hope that you'll succeed in your final exams. And I'm sorry I can't be here for your birthday. So, happy birthday!' after receiving it I cried in my room and my friends had to cheer me up all night. And I tried to understand his circumstance and wished him the very best of luck. I miss you, Bang Rafi!

I also want to tell you guys about my post sister, Kak Masya Afira Siregar. She was so emotional when she was about to leave TN. She took a lot of pictures with me and I know that she'd miss me as much as I'd miss her. We laughed and shared stories till it was time for her to leave the campus. We hugged each other and she gave me a cute 'Lil Sis' keychain which came up with a match of 'Big Sis' which she had with her. She also gave me an Universitas Indonesia pencil case. A month before, she gave me her bag and she told me how memorable the bag was and she wanted me to keep it on her behalf. I was so honored that she'd let me use her bag. And I told myself to handle it with care.

I also saw my bed sister for the last time, Kak Ulfa Hasna Azizah. She was in a hurry that I could only talk to her for a few minutes. We hugged each other and cried. I really missed her since I hadn't seen her since March and seeing her left the campus just like that hurt a lot. I really loved her since she's been a real sister for me that she supported me since PDK. I gave her the ordinary present that I had prepared a few days earlier and she smiled at me and thanked me for everything. My 23rd batch bed sister, Kak Faradita Maudy Sari, cried heavily seeing Kak Ulfa left. They hugged for a moment then we took some pictures and then there she left for her future.. I'm gonna miss you so much, Kak Ulfa!

And the last one was Kak Vania. She's my jacket sister of PATAKA. My very first impression of her was she looked like a mean senior with a pretty face and so unfriendly. But she turned out to be a very awesome sister. It felt really good to tell her stories--especially when it came to boys--and she also treated her juniors nicely. She hugged me and told me how she loved my gift for her and she would miss me very much. She listened to my stories and I enjoyed listening to hers. I also gave her a key chain just like mine and Kak Rahajeng's, my 23rd batch jacket sister. We then took a lot of pictures in many people's cameras and phones since hers was in the classroom and I didn't bring mine. We laughed and she told me to be strong and if there anything happens to me in the future I should tell her right away. Miss you already, Kak Van!

And I know that in every meeting, there's a goodbye. And I should remember that there's a 'good' in 'goodbyes' and I just need to swallow the temporary pain and let go. I'm gonna miss everyone leaving for their future.

Old friends are like golds,
New friends are like silvers,
Cherish your new friends,
But never forget the old ones.

Good luck, Bang, Kak!

I love you!

-Abigail Gee

The Common Thing between Me & Denise

Hi there, everyone!
I've been so busy at school (though I sometimes still keep my Facebook updated hehe) that I had no enough time to actually post something. But trust me, I've been dying to write you readers, if you ever exist, something.

So here it goes.

---

This is the story of Denise.

[Denise]

The story began somewhere in October, where I failed doing something and then someone came to me and offered me a new point of view and this someone really did open my eyes, abut how I shouldn't waste my time regretting things and start fresh, that there were still many other options to choose from, and my life didn't end as I failed.

Then I fell for that person ever since.

I couldn't meet him everyday and when we met I couldn't do anything about it. He smiled to me that day, the day when I finally got something that not only me, but all of my fellow students had been seeking for months. That afternoon, we were all running chasing seniors. Then after hugging a senior, I saw him. With his dirty face, clothes, and naked feet. It was like the world  around us just blurred and the time just stopped. He was looking at me and I looked at him back. Then he smiled and said, "Semangat ya!" [Indonesian for 'Keep your spirit up!']. I was blushed but I could only smile and said, "Thanks!' and chased another senior. It was just, perfect.

I don't know. I would like to tell you that only. To show that it actually stays in my heart as something special, that it has its own place there. That I will always remember that little moment when he actually smiled to me.

And maybe, just maybe, he might answer all the questions in my head. Maybe with a yes or with a no, I don't know. What's most important is my feeling towards him can stay, not how he would actually respond to me.

Thank you for being in my life for once, colouring it in a temporary moment, giving new perspectives to look from, caring for me whenever I need to, giving me the attention that I crave for sometimes, but still keeping me awake that I need to keep landing my feet on the ground.

I love how he makes every conversation sound dreamy but keeps things real at the same time.

[Interviewer]

So do you still like him?

[Denise]

Honestly, I don't know. Maybe I'll just relax, sit down, and enjoy the movie while it lasts. Then when it comes to the credit, I'll make sure of it.

---

Ok so I don't know what I just wrote but it just ran through my brain so smoothly. But I hoep you like this shortie. I'll post you something real later okay? This is just a random piece stuck in my brain that forces me to let it be read by you.

Stay reading!

-Abigail Gee

Scary Night Shots!

I know I should've posted something sweet and lovely since it's almost Valentines and given advice of romance and stuff but since I have no one to think about or anything romantic to celebrate so I'll post scary things. Doesn't Halloween on Valentine's Day sound good, especially for single people like me? *coughs*

So when I was 13, I took some pictures using my Dad's handycam and I found this weird mode called 'Nightshot'. I know, I was pretty much blind about technology and I tried to take pictures in Nightshot mode and all of the pictures looked SCARY. So here are a few random photos taken that day. Enjoy the fright :)

don't my eyes look scary?

she. looks. scary. as. hell.

this is the scary part of 13 year-old me

*run*

Ok, so the last picture was really really scary. That's Bi Meng by the way, in case you're wondering who that is. So I hope you don't have nightmares because of the shots and you still visit my blog (though I'm pretty sure only a few human beings really visit my blog and read my random posts). Happy Bloody Valentine's Day for those who are lucky enough to celebrate it.

Sincerely the lonely random,

-Abigail Gee

Being Bullied?

Hi!
I've been feeling really stressed out and blue lately that I don't know how to express it. People seemed to be so judgemental nowadays. So I kept being bullied in the class, being hated by some people, made fun by some random boys at school, doubted by teachers, disliked by the seniors, unloved by surroundings. And the worst part was, I'm away from my parents so I have no place to shelter.

But then I started to realize a few things that I never thought of before.

1. Not everybody likes you. Not everybody will accept you for who you are and become your friends. Not everybody will welcome you when you suddenly join in a group or forum, but not everybody hates you either. Everything always has two sides; positive or negative, good or bad, loved or hated, liked or disliked, anything. There will always be some kind of comparisons to what happens in your life, you know?

2. It's you who makes yourself burdened. If you try to let go all those painful things you'll realize that since the start they weren't pains at all. Pretend that those people who hate you are just little rocks blocking your way. You just need to jump to realize that they're just small obstacles and by jumping that means you'll go further than them. As long as you still love yourself, you've got nothing to be worried about.

3. Think of things in different perspectives. Stop thinking about something in one way only. Let's make an analogy for it. Pretend that you haven't eaten because your mom is so busy that she can't cook you meals and you feel sad, angry, and pissed off with her because you think that she doesn't love you and nobody's home who cares enough to make you food. But being mad at your mom won't make your stomach filled with food right? So instead of blaming things on your mom, why don't you cook meals for yourself? It's just as simple as that. So if someone doesn't like you, why don't you find someone else to hang out with? Besides, it adds great positive points because that means you're widening your area of socialization.

4. It's not how to please them so they'll like you, it's basically how to show them that you're great in some way. DON'T EVER try to please others. You weren't born to make them happy or so they accept you. No. All you can do is to show that you're fine without them and they don't matter to you.

5. Remember this mantra : if people around you try to bring you down, that means you're above them all. You actually win the game but you keep thinking about how you should look good in front of them and to make them pleased more than to be satisfied of what you achieve. If they still mock you, remember, you deserve better friends. There's plenty of fish in the sea phrase doesn't only be applied in your romance life, but also in your social life. If these 'friends' don't work, you can still find better people in this world.

Thinking of these things, really helped me getting through my hard times. Now, my friends stopped making fun of me and everything slowly went to normal. Hope some of this piece of mind helps you as well. Remember, you were born to be loved by at least one special person.

Good night!

-Abigail Gee

The Delayota Adventure Proofs

So as I promised, I'd like to share some pictures of the team winning the trophies and we finally found some on the school's website.

But I felt too lazy to copy and save all the pictures so for instance, I'll just copy the link to the pictures and you may see them for yourself. Enjoy :)

P.S: Sorry :(

Link : Juara Debat Bahasa Inggris dan Bahasa Indonesia SMAN 8 Yogyakarta

Love,

-Abigail Gee